~Riddle(s)~


Once a book that belonged to me

Was lost.

I searched in my room,

And I searched out.

It was gone, nowhere to be found.

 

***

I never saw my book again,

Until I found it after a few months,

Under my bed.

I could have sworn,

That was the first place where I looked.

***

As I flipped through the pages,

I realized someone has it read,

And was kind enough to have it left.

Just under my bed.

It was never the same book again.

***

Someone found me when I was lost too.

I did not ask to be found, but Someone did.

I belonged to that someone.

Then the someone left.

Would I ever truly belong to someone else?

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~About A Dream~


Have you ever lived you dream?

Have you ever loved a woman so much that ,

You could die so she could be safe?

Or better,

You could kill to protect her?

Or better,

You could live the best you can

For her,with her?

I have.

***********

Have you ever lived your dream?

Have you ever loved someone so fiercely,

That you have deeply regretted meeting her,

So late in your life, because you missed her childhood?

Have you ever shared a bond stronger than you share with yourself?

Have you ever felt the helplessness that a man feels,

When his woman cries and he cannot make her happy?

Have you ever felt the joy that a man feels

When she lights up his world with her sunshine smile?

I have.

***********

Have you woken up and realized,

Your dreams is over,

And it was only yours,

Your heart is in pieces,

And it is only yours,

Yet you are alive,

Breathing, walking, eating.

You’ve everything you had,

but not a purpose?

I have.

 

Falling Stars


Everything is falling apart.

Even the stars are coming down on me tonight.

Look around – men and women are in love.

Two decaying bodies pleasuring each other,

In the hope of getting something back.

A vain attempt of a dying being at immortality.

 

Still children are beautiful.

So are falling stars.

So is love.

So pick up the broken pieces again,

Pick yourself up and your broken heart.

May be you will see the Sun rise beyond this night.

 

Chapter 2 – The Dream


He woke up in his own bed, drenched in cold sweat. He felt that he was burning up. The window was a bit open like every other night. He never felt at ease without fresh air. The images from the dream was still lingering in his mind. He, himself, was not fully awake but was drifting somewhere between reality and the dream.

“What’s bothering you?” – asked the big old Oak. It had only a few leaves left. He could barely make out the tree in the dark, but he could feel that the Oak was there. It was as real as any other tree that he had ever seen. Stars were shining above his head but he could not even make out the land on which he was standing. He could only see the stars and the silhouette of the old tree. The moon was no where to be seen.

How can the moon exist in a world where the Sun has abandoned you?

“The wall.” – he replied cautiously, as if too scared to hear his own voice in the dark.

“Do you see it?” – he asked interrupting the silence that existed for a brief moment between the tree and himself.

“No I don’t see it.” – the Oak replied. Its voice calm and deep.

“But I can feel it. Just like I can’t see you but I can feel your existence, I can feel the opaque wall. It’s real. It’s the reason I’m dying, don’t you see that? I’m a tree, I need the Sun more than you do.”

“Its real then. But why is it happening to only us?” – he asked. His voice strained with  doubts and anxiety.

“I don’t know that yet. But I can tell you something that I know. You and I are not that different Kafka.” – the Oak took a long pause.

“What do you mean by that?” – he asked more confused now than before. How could the tree, possibly know his name?

“I’m merely your reflection and you are mine. Do you think, we, all living being, have our own individual existence? We all are connected to each other in someway. But it can happen that the connection between two living being is much stronger than any other connections that they have and when it happens they begin to share similar fate or destiny. ”

A brief paused followed. Kafka felt that he was burning up from inside.

“Every little choice that you make in your life – is it really that you’re making the choices or do the choices make you? Have you ever thought that why do you like certain characters from movies, books or even in real life more than the other characters? Is it because you find similarities between your life and their lives or your life begins to resemble theirs beginning from the moment when you decide to like these characters?”

A longer pause followed along with a cool summer breeze. Kafka stood there in silence. He had more questions than ever before but he did not ask a single one.

“I’m your favorite tree. Or at least I used to be your favorite tree. You spent your childhood days playing around me.”

Kafka remembered. This was the same old oak that was there behind the summer house that Kafka’s father had to sell to pay a bad loan when Kafka was only 12. He spent his first twelve summers in that house.

It was now dying. Because it could not get the Sun.

Kafka felt a lump in his throat and a sharp pain in his chest. He felt that his eyes were tearing up and he felt that he could break down in tears at any moment.

But he could not cry.

Probably it would be easier if he could cry his hearts out but he just could not. He was nauseating and his heart started to beat irregularly.

“I wish I could cry. I would feel much better If I could cry.” – whispered Kafka.

“You can’t. You’re my reflection and I’m yours. Trees don’t cry Kafka.” – the Oak replied, its voice calmer than ever.

“Don’t look for the Sun Kafka. I will not survive without it but you will. Look for warmth, look inside.”

A cool breeze blew through the branches of the dying tree, making it sound like the old Oak sighed.Kafka felt like he was sinking, he was slipping into the darkness from which he rose.

Kafka woke up in his bed, drenched in cold sweat.

***

(…..to be continued)

Chapter 1 – The Wall


Imagine one day waking up and finding out that there is no Sun for you.

Yes, it means that there is no Sun for you and you only .

The Sun has risen and it has lit up the whole world. Like always. Like the infinite number of days that were there before you existed and the infinite number of days that will come even when you cease to exist, but its not there for you anymore.

Your vision has been blurred by an opaque wall through which you can still observe what is happening around you and when you do, you can come to only one conclusion – rest of the world is going on like everything is fine. Its only you who has been abandoned by the Sun. The wall around your vision is only opaque and not pitch black because the universe wants to remind you that its only you who is missing out the Sun.

Everyone else is doing just fine.

You find your way to go through life. You establish a routine which helps you to go through it but it never helps you to get used used to your colorless life. You start wondering if its same for a gold fish living in a fish bowl. Since its vision of the world through the glass must be distorted.

Does it get used to it? Does it established a routine inside the bowl its living in and go though life like you do? Does it keep on living with a discomfort and endless questions?

But gold fishes do not speak. You start speaking less too. The people around you, they don’t see the wall.  But if you communicate to them for long, they understand that there is something off about you. So you don’t. You understand that the opaque wall exists only around your vision and not around theirs. As if its not real, as if its a disease. For the first time in your life, you hope that you have a disease. Since some diseases are curable. May be there will be a way to cure your disease too. Even if its not a disease, you hope that one day, some day, you will get your Sun back. Your world will be colorful and vibrant again, like it was once. May be one fine morning you will wake up and there will be a Sun lit world before your eyes and that day you will know that you have been forgiven and the wall has vanished.

You keep yourself tied to your routines. You keep your conversations short and simple. You no longer make real connections to the people. If you sense that there is someone who is trying to connect to you, you withdraw. You bury yourself in your own world, in your own scent.

Yet you live in your world, in your blurred down, colorless world with one hope that one day, someday, everything will be fine. Time passes in minutes and in days. Your will decays along with your body and soul. But the hope in you, remains.

So does the opaque wall.

***

(To Be Continued…)

Soul(s)


Not everyone can do everything.

Some can swim, some can’t.

Some can sing, some can’t.

Some can paint, some can’t.

Some can love, some can’t.

 

Souls were made in pairs.

Boys and girls.

Boys and boys.

Girls and Boys

Girls and girls.

 

Souls were made in pairs.

Then they were split into two.

Souls were sent to us.

One was me, one were you.

We found each other.

 

Not everyone can find peace.

Not everyone can find wealth.

Not everyone can have bliss,

Not everyone can have good health.

Every soul seeks the missing half.

Some find and can love, some can’t.

 

~Things We Know~


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We did not choose –

Where we were born

And What we were born with.

Not the colors of our skins,

Not the names & surnames.

Not the Gods we prayed.

Not the flags we saluted.

***

We grow up-

Learn to expect

maximum out of minimum

And want to spend

more hours dreaming and take

only a few hard minutes

To give up on our dreams.

***

We grow old-

We judge our time spent

By what all we did

That seems right

Because the outcome

Is always familiar.

Never knowing what else was there, too.

***

It was one in a million-

chance that I met you.

Could not have as

We did not know what separated us.

Now there is space & time,

Now there is money & Gods.

Things we know we can overcome.

~ Fairytale and Reality~


When I met you I realized
You are not quite the girl I dreamt about
I saw your smile and it felt so normal
I saw your eyes and they felt so natural
where was the touch of fairytale gone?

Then the girl I dreamt about left my dreams
And I started dreaming about you instead
Your smile felt so normal but it was real
and I could not get over your shiny eyes
Because all along they were wearing my reflection.

And its not raining here tonight
I can hear the clouds colliding in the sky
and somehow I know I will not be dreaming of you
’cause I will save your face for the time when I am awake.
I wonder if you ever think of me, If you do please let me know.